Angus thinks Rohini just wants to talk about their new kitten, Aurora, but he then realizes she does have a point and Aurora’s adjustment to her new home is a good example of how nervous systems are designed to naturally regulate through the fight, flight, freeze response. This applies to humans as well as kittens.
It is good to see the health in how the nervous system functions. It is especially helpful for relationships when people recognize that they don’t have control over their nervous systems going into the fight, flight, or freeze response. This happens beyond our conscious awareness. It is a physiological response that impacts behavior. Understanding this helps us be kind to ourselves when we get dysregulated and not take our partner’s behavior personally when they are dysregulated. This doesn’t mean that our behavior or our partner’s behavior is acceptable, but it does help us to have an informed perspective on what is going on.
And what helps overall nervous system health is to spend time connecting and experiencing the peace and well-being within us. Rohini experienced profound healing and settling of her nervous system after having a deeper experience of her true nature that had very practical benefits in her relationship with Angus.
If you would like to listen to the Rewilding Love Podcast, it comes out in serial format. Start with Episode 1 for context. Click here to listen. And, if you would like to dive deeper into the understanding I share along with additional support please check out the Rewilding Community.
Angus & Rohini Ross are “The Rewilders.” Listen to their podcast Rewilding Love. They believe too many good relationships fall apart because couples give up thinking their relationship problems can’t be solved. Many couples don’t know how to navigate low moods, conflict, and emotional reactivity. In this season of the Rewilding Love Podcast, Rohini and Angus help a couple on the brink of divorce due to conflict. Angus and Rohini love working with couples and helping them to reduce conflict and discord in their relationships by pointing them to their innate wisdom and wellbeing. They work with couples who are struggling and couples who would like to deepen the love and intimacy they already have. They co-facilitate private couples' intensives that rewild relationships back to their natural state of love.
Rohini is the author of the ebook Marriage, and they are co-founders of The 29-Day Rewilding Experience and The Rewilding Community. You can also follow Angus and Rohini Ross on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. To learn more about their work visit: TheRewilders.org. Check out Rohini's latest blog post.